For hope and healing after abortion


Letting God Heal Me

Thank you so much for teaching me not how to open my eyes, but instead how to open my heart. You taught me the first thing I had to do in order to heal, is open my heart to God. I had no idea just how closed up I had become over the years. Although I believed I was allowing God to love me, I still did not feel worthy to accept it. Today, I realize I was doing my will, punishing myself daily, and not letting God in to do His will, to heal me.

As many times as I begged for His forgiveness, I still had kept Him away from that one dark little corner that I was so ashamed of - the corner in which I needed Him most, the one in which I allowed so much pain to grow for three decades.

At Project Rachel, I became aware of exactly how much of Godís love I had been turning away Ė how much mercy he has for everyone of us. Jesus did not die on the Cross in order to call me a sinner, but He died on the Cross to forgive me and my sins. Forgive me in order for me to begin to heal. I do not believe he would have punished me as long as I had. Now that I have come to Project Rachel, with God doing his work through all of you, I am able to feel a deep sense of peace in my heart. God has been making me stronger every day since I last saw you in February. I feel good about myself for the first time in 32 years. Iím in a healthier relationship with my husbandÖand overall my whole attitude has begun to turn around. For the first time in the past seven years, I have stopped taking anxiety medication completely, and have cut back on the amount of antidepressants I take. And the wonderful part about all of these changes, is that it is coming from within me through my Higher Power. If God has forgiven me, who am I to do my will, and not forgive myself? It is time to let him take over, again.

To all of you helping and healing at Project Rachel, I want you to know I will always remain forever grateful. God bless.